Signs of being played?

Ok, I have been dating this female who was previously married and is in the process of a legal sep. She has two children and lives in the house the she and her (ex) husband bought a year ago. She recently quite her job (stupid) and is struggeling with $$ as she now works part time and doesn't have any other income. Her (ex) husband does not want to caugh up for the bills, and only pays child support when he wants to. Although I have my own place, I stay at her house from time to time. We have been arguing alot lately due to her personality... always missarable, never happy, but more so her financial situation. Last night she stated that she was upset because I never helped her out with any of the bills. My argument was that the bills are created by her and the (ex) husband and she should sue him for that. But she claimed, because I stayed at her house frequently that I should pay up. Light, water, ect. True, I do stay there, however, I have my own place (bills), and if it comes down to it, I can simply just visit her if that is the case. Prior to this, a few months back, she called me cheap as I chilled on spending alot of money when going on. I always calculate on how much things cost... hey, why not question your $$ right?! In any event, her sister who is dating a married guy pays for repairs for the sisters house and I guess some of the bills (I am assuming he does) The first time I met this guy he told me that the sister is always suspecting and accusing him of being secret about his life. Funny, I hear the same thing from her.... maybe a sister thing?? In any event, I have tried to motivate her to be happy, do things, such as taking her to places that she never been to.. no, not travel far countries, but just quite places in the park where she can think and relax, restaurants that are different than just the plain old TGIF or Applebees... even with all this, and trying to find her a new job/career (making a new resume, job searches, ect) she is still on a up/down rolla' coaster. I feel i'm waisting time here, but when I decide to break loose, I have a tendency or should I say fear of making a mistake because I care for her alot.... what is your take on this. Any suggestions/comments, may it be negative or positive are more than welcome. Thanks!Signs of being played?
i agree with daisy. u r being played. if u can fix things that don't cost a lot then fine. tighten a drain or stop a leak with a new washer. change her oil fine if she wants a new roof tell her she needs a f/t job. if she works opposite shift offer to sit her kids but if she is that off the hook i would find a female to do it cos if she gets mad at u she can accuse u of doing bad things then ur *** will be in jail and she will be playing the next guy. back off. tell her if she can't accept the gifts u do for her then she needs a rich old man to play daddy to her. go back to your apt and when u visit bring the pizza or whatever to suppliment the food u eat. other than that u really don't owe her or u could ask her to stay at your place and incur the utility fees over there instead. u r not married to her, not the kid's father and not obligated to support the kids, or her. she needs to learn that partners help not inder. and do u really think your salary can do it all in this 2 income family struggling to get along world especially where she wants to spend and not earn. she needs to grow up and this may be one of the reasons y the ex left. u have a lot to consider and throwing ur savings to save someone who wants to add to the burden, that is stupidity. back off. tell her to accept u as u r or move on. see if she changes her tune. it may be a family thing she learned but she doesn't need to be like family she chose to be that way. so til she grows up and chooses to be adult about this. if u stay u will add to the monster the family created. if u back off u may downgrade her attitude back to caring and human. she may be just taking her frustration for her ex on u cos u r handy. don't take the abuse. good luck

Signs of being played?
It sounds like she wants you to take care of her - completely - which is usually related to self-esteem problems. Basically, she doesn't think she can take care of herself, so she wants someone else to do it all for her. You might suggest to her that she gets some counseling so she can learn to take care of herself and not be completely dependent on a man to take care of her.

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